Do you say yes when you mean no? Find out your pattern, your hidden strength, and one small thing to try this week.
6 questions · 2 minutes · no email needed to see your result
Who made this
Hi, I’m Tessa
I’m a certified life coach and a recovering people-pleaser. I used to say yes to everything and wonder why I was so tired. Now I help women who say yes when they mean no set boundaries without the guilt.
This little quiz is how I start most conversations. It’s for reflection, not therapy, and it’s meant to be kind.
THTessa HartCertified life coach
Question 1 of 6
A friend asks for a favour you really don't have time for. You…
The group chat is planning a dinner. You…
It’s 6 pm and your boss asks you to “quickly” finish something. You…
Your meal arrives and it’s not what you ordered. You…
Someone seems upset with you. You…
At the end of a long week, what wears you out most?
THTessa HartCertified life coach
Your result
Your type is The Helper
You’d rather keep the peace than win the point.
What it looks like
You say “it’s fine” when it isn’t, steer round tense conversations, and feel a knot in your stomach when someone is annoyed with you.
Your hidden strength
You stay calm when others don’t. People relax around you, and you spot trouble long before anyone else does.
What it can cost you
The things that need saying stay unsaid, small worries pile up, and your own opinion gets harder to find.
One thing to try this week
Pick one tiny choice, like where to eat, and say what you actually prefer. Notice that the evening carries on just fine.
If someone needs something, you’re already on it.
What it looks like
You say yes before you’ve checked your diary, remember everyone’s birthday and problems, and feel a bit lost when nobody needs you.
Your hidden strength
You notice what people need before they say it. That warmth is real, and it’s why people trust you.
What it can cost you
Your own list waits, you end up tired, and you can feel quietly unappreciated when the favour isn’t returned.
One thing to try this week
When someone asks for something, try: “Let me check and get back to you.” Give yourself one night before you answer.
You show your worth by doing more, and doing it well.
What it looks like
You over-prepare, stay late, and say yes to the extra project, then find that praise never quite lands.
Your hidden strength
You’re reliable, driven and thorough. People hand you the important things because you follow through.
What it can cost you
Rest feels like slacking, and “enough” keeps moving further away, however much you do.
One thing to try this week
Do one thing this week at “good enough” on purpose. Then watch what really happens (usually: nothing bad).
You read the room so well you can become whatever it needs.
What it looks like
You borrow the tone, opinions and even the laugh of whoever you’re with, and go home unsure what you thought.
Your hidden strength
You’re a gifted listener. You make people feel understood and get along with almost anyone.
What it can cost you
After a while it gets hard to say what you want or think, because you’ve been busy being what everyone else prefers.
One thing to try this week
Once a day, before you answer, ask yourself “What do I think?” and say that first, even about small things like lunch.
This quiz is for reflection, not therapy. Real people are a mix of all four, and that’s fine. Retake the quiz
THTessa HartCertified life coach
Jamie’s inbox
The three emails after the quiz
This is what lands in Jamie’s inbox. Tap each one to read it, and open the last one: that’s the day-4 email, with the button to book a call.
Tessa Hart <tessa@example.com>
To: Jamie · Right away
Your full guide to your type
Hi Jamie,
Thanks for taking the quiz. Your guide to being your type is below. It’s short on purpose.
What your pattern looks like on a normal Tuesday
Why it’s a strength first, and where it gets tiring
Three kind ways to say no, word for word
Try just one of the scripts this week. Small is plenty.
Warmly, Tessa
P.S. Hit reply and tell me how it goes. I read every one.
Tessa Hart <tessa@example.com>
To: Jamie · Day 2
The yes that cost me
Hi Jamie,
A few years ago I said yes to helping a friend move on the weekend of my own birthday. I didn’t want to go. I said “sure, no problem!” anyway.
I spent the day carrying boxes and feeling a bit sorry for myself. Nobody had pushed me. I had just never practised saying anything else.
That was the day I started. Not with a big speech, just with one small “I can’t this time.” The friendship was fine. I was lighter.
Has a yes like that cost you something lately?
Warmly, Tessa
Tessa Hart <tessa@example.com>
To: Jamie · Day 4
Want to talk it through?
Hi Jamie,
You got your type in the quiz, and I’d love to hear how that fits your life.
If you’d like company with it, I’m offering a free 20-minute call. We’ll talk about what’s hard right now and what a first small step could be. No pressure, and it’s completely fine if we’re not a fit.
Warmly, Tessa
THTessa HartCertified life coach
Free · 20 minutes
Book a free call with Tessa
Your host, Tessa Hart
What the call is
A friendly chat about what feels hard right now
A first small step you can try this week
A chance to ask me anything
What it isn’t
A sales pitch. No hard sell, ever.
A commitment. It’s fine if we’re not a fit.
THTessa HartCertified life coach
All set
You’re booked, Jamie!
Your free 20-minute call with Tessa is on Wednesday, 2:30 PM.
Pretend button: nothing is added anywhere.
Before we talk
One thing to think about
Think of one moment this week when you said yes and wished you hadn’t. Just notice it. We’ll start there.
What to expect
A reminder email the day before, with the link
A relaxed chat on Wednesday, 2:30 PM, camera optional
